Coping

We are now into day -7. This is calculated as a countdown of days before the transplant. It makes it sound exciting but the days are really not like that at all. In fact, when I wrote to my mother today I said that I thought my days were about as exciting as hers.

Fortunately, I am less anaemic so that I haven't had to have any more blood transfusions today. In addition, although I reacted quite badly to the chemo on Monday, yesterday went far more smoothly. However, I am incredibly tired. A physiotherapist came to talk to me yesterday about exercise. I think my exercise for the day was reading through the exercises.

Jonathan came to see me yesterday and it was so lovely to see him. He fixed up the dvd player for me and showed me how to download some programmes. We went for a little walk around the wards. Today Ray has been able to come. He brought up all the extras that I need and although it took some time via 3 trains and a bus he seemed quite pleased about how the journey was managed.

I am finding it very difficult to concentrate at the moment whether it is TV or reading. I normally go through all the crosswords, codewords and su doku in the paper reasonably quickly but it is all rather slow at the moment. However, the programme is moving ahead. At times I want to escape as this is really serious stuff but I know I can't; there is no backing out now and so many people have wished me well. I just have to summon up the courage to cope as best I can.