Sunday, 31 January 2010


This is an exciting time for so many people I know with trips and changes of direction. My son leaves Watchdog to start working on a new BBC programme and our daughter is off to Amsterdam. Friends have just returned from the Caribbean and others are just starting on holidays to faraway destinations. If we were just idling around wasting our time, I suppose I would be envious, but we have a different sort of journey to prepare for.

The wonderful thing is that all these people have taken time out to send me messages so I’ve had emails from Canada and India, phone calls and emails from France as well as postcards. Somehow knowing that life is going on for all of us and we can all keep in touch is very reassuring.

I’ve had a cold all week so I’ve had to keep away from crowded places to ensure it doesn’t turn into anything worse. I really don’t want this tight schedule to be derailed at the last minute. This means I haven’t been able to see my mother in the past few days and telephone messages just aren’t the same as I know she will be worrying. It doesn’t matter how old our offspring get, they are and always will be our children.

Raymond has been trying to keep me steady all day. It’s not that this operation tomorrow is major but it is all part of the process leading up to the transplant. We have had a good life together and hate to see it being threatened but there is no alternative. Whenever I start to feel sorry for myself I remember the cancer sufferers who have to endure so much pain and disfigurement. We have to view 2010 as a doorway through to something better. Maybe this time next year, we too will be planning a change of direction and looking through the travel brochures.

And for anyone reading this who is alone while undergoing treatment for cancer/lymphoma, there is a great brotherhood/sisterhood out there, so keep hoping!

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