Walking with hope

Ray and I spent about three and a half hours yesterday with the barrister finalising all the details ready for the papers to be served today after signature. It has meant a flurry of activity in the last few days where we have been able to concentrate on little else. Hopefully after today we can begin to get our lives on track for a little while but it gives us a taste of what is to come next year if the case gets to court. I had two large measures of coffee (which I don’t normally drink) before going to the barrister’s chambers in order to keep myself awake and alert as I normally start to get very tired at midday.

We’re just off on our morning walk. This keeps me not only a little more active, but it is a symbol of normality as Ray and I can shrug off the cares of our lives just for an hour. We have a pact to avoid the really troublesome issues in our lives for that period and just concentrate on the more positive aspects. It tends to revitalise me for the day ahead and I miss it if we can’t go.

I’m looking forward to seeing my aunt and cousin next week. The revelations about my conception have inevitably caused me to re-evaluate my family relationships. I have always been close to my mother’s family, fortunately, and I am so glad I still have them to talk to about my new situation. My cousin has always been an inspiration as she has been confined to a wheelchair for over 30 years since her road accident. Actually “confined” is the wrong word. Nothing confines her as she is a really outgoing, gentle and generous person who gets on with life.

My daughter is coming with us and she laughs when we get together as our voices are all so similar that she can’t distinguish between them. I suppose I really should have picked up on this years ago but I just thought I wasn’t physically very like my father’s family. I am trying to pack in a few visits with family and friends over the next two months as I don’t know what will happen next year but it’s good to travel with hope.