Battles on all fronts

When I knew in November 2008 that the lymphoma had returned and my only course of action was to prepare for a bone marrow transplant, I knew it would be difficult, but I had no idea how many battles I would be fighting on so many fronts at once. I knew that it would be hard to get the disease into remission, but I had no idea that I would have to be the one to prompt consultants into taking action. If I did not have private insurance and was relying on the National Health, I am pretty certain that the transplant would not be possible because of the delays.

I now know that I have to watch each specialist like a hawk. Of course, some are absolutely excellent but if the key personnel guiding your treatment are not really efficient, then it really is a matter of life and death. I had hoped to have a pleasant relationship with all the medical staff but I realise I must be vigilant and assertive at all times. This is easier said than done when you are in a weakened state. Sometimes it is easier being assertive for other family members than for yourself.

But life goes on. We really could do without this wretched case against Biffa. On of their lorries ran into the back of a stationary line of traffic at 58 miles an hour. Ray was in the penultimate vehicle. The driver made no attempt to stop. What he was doing I do not know. He was prosecuted and found guilty. I don’t know how the other people in the traffic are faring but it has been very difficult for Ray who has been physically, mentally and emotionally damaged.

He has had a lot of medical bills resulting from the accident and the time spent attending his medical appointments has meant time away from the business. The papers have now been entered into Court which may mean that a timetable will be set up which the other side must adhere to but we expect all sorts of ploys to enable them to have more time – but why? The Biffa lorry driver was guilty – why not do the honourable thing and pay up?

Ray has had all the medical examinations necessary for the case and at each stage the other side could have suggested a professional of their own choosing but they chose not to answer letters. No doubt they will now want their own professionals used as a means of delaying payment still further. Do they hope we will give up? Do they hope we will run out of money? Do they hope I will die and Ray will not want to pursue the case? If Biffa were an honourable company they would intervene and let us have whatever time we have left to spend together in a calm, secure and stress-free atmosphere. But that begs the question – is Biffa an honourable company? Too many battles on too many fronts. I just pray for the energy to go on.